Last night was Aidan's benefit/silent auction, and yesterday morning was the last MOPS meeting of the semester. What an emotional day. After finding out that we will be driving to the hospital once a week to receive treatment, groups from within my MOPS group have been blessing our family with monetary donations, gas cards, freezer meals for the days that I just can't find the energy to make dinner, and even adopting our family for Christmas. I was brought to tears yesterday during the Christmas message that was given by a sweet mentor mom. It was made apparent that she didn't have the easiest childhood, but she knew that she had a purpose and she shared that purpose with us. One specific part of her story hit close to home: both her and her husband have/are battling cancer. Her husband currently has an uncurable form of cancer. I felt as though she was speaking directly to me when she shared her message. I cried, I laughed. To be as humble and as open as she is about her struggles--I could only dream of that. I still feel as though I have to be the strong one because if I don't, everyone that is watching me will fall apart and then how in the heck am I supposed to look to those around me to help me when I actually do fall apart?? I am praying for two things to come during this cancer journey, and I am sharing them with you so that you can hold me accountable (where possible). One being that obviously Aidan is cured of this heartwrenching disease and that it never, ever, ever comes back. Two....that I would lean on God for guidance, for strength, for peace during the extra difficult days, and that I would be a testimony to those around me of just what it means to be a child of His.
"There is a depth of intimacy with God that can only be known through suffering. There is a reliance on Him that can only be experienced when everything else around my soul seems to give way. And if that's what it takes to make this stubborn child cling to that old rugged cross, you can have your prosperity.
I'd rather have Jesus."
--Laura Story; What If Your Blessings Come Through Raindrops?
Last night, at the very last minute a sweet new friend of mine showed up with her husband. I met her at MOPS this semester, the Thursday before Aidan's surgery. She got up in front of the group and shared her story and asked for prayers. Long story short, her neurosurgeon is the same one that had and would be operating on my Aidan. I cried when I shared that with her. Throughout the week Aidan was inpatient, she visited, and I was given the great opportunity to meet her family, and be surrounded by the people in her small group from church. What hit me really hard was the day I was told the cancer was malignant; I literally fell apart. But amazingly all of these great people were there for her surgery that same day, and they surrounded me with love and prayers. I didn't even have to say anything. I recently bought this new friend a charm that represents what she's currently dealing with and had a mutual friend deliver it to her. Last night was the first night I had seen my friend since the day before her surgery. Again, at a loss for words. I wanted to tell her just how blessed I feel to have met her when I did, that literally just seeing her face brought me peace. I couldn't stop hugging her! (and of course, to talk myself down from just wanting to sob) Thank you friend, for the peace you give by just being there.
"Every experience God gives us, every person He puts into our lives, is the perfect preparation for a future only He can see."
--Corrie Ten Boom
Thank you God for the people, and the experiences you have put in my life.
-Courtney
1 comment:
This is a beautiful post. <3
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